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Gaya

In the words of Davido, “love is sweet o, when money enter, love is sweeter.” Unfortunately, money can also comot, and dating has a very sneaky way of making this happen. You won’t even know you’re spending that much. Everything feels small. Everything feels justified. Everything is “it’s just this once.”

Until one random day, you check your bank account and start asking questions nobody can answer.&nbsp;Where did my money go?&nbsp;You were in love, babe.

So we decided to investigate this very serious matter: how much does it actually cost to date in Nigeria? And by “date,” we don’t mean celebrity couple, private jet, Maldives, soft life. We mean regular Nigerian boyfriend-and-girlfriend behaviour.

For the sake of this calculation, let's imagine a fairly normal Nigerian couple. They both work. They don't live together. They see each other regularly. They go on dates. They buy each other gifts. They occasionally send each other money. They like doing nice things together.

They're not living an extravagant celebrity lifestyle. Nobody is flying anybody to Dubai every three months. Nobody is buying a brand-new iPhone every Valentine's Day. We're just looking at the ordinary things that can come with being in a relationship.

Because we're calculating this annually, we're going to include both the regular expenses and those special occasions that show up once or twice a year.

Let's start with the most basic requirement of having a relationship: actually seeing the person.

They see each other twice a month. We are budgeting ₦15,000 per trip. That is a reasonable middle ground because some people will take public transport while others are ordering Uber, and honestly, if you are going to see your partner you probably are not arriving completely empty handed.

You'll carrying snacks, stop to buy their favourite drink, or just something they mentioned they needed.

₦15,000 × 2 trips × 12 months = ₦360,000. This can obviously go much higher if you are seeing each other every weekend or living far apart.

We are not talking about sitting in somebody's house watching Netflix. We are talking about a proper date. You dress up. You order food. Maybe drinks. Maybe dessert. You take pictures. You gist, and then you have to get home, which means transport is also joining the bill.

₦50,000 per date. One proper date every month. ₦50,000 × 12 = ₦600,000. Before somebody says "who is spending ₦50k on a date" — please. There are people currently reading this who have spent ₦50k on a date and still ordered dessert. You know yourselves.

Ah. The relationship expense with no receipt. "Babe, please send me something."
 "I'm hungry." "My data has finished."
 "I need transport."
 "Something just came up."

Sometimes it is ₦5,000. Sometimes ₦10,000. Sometimes you send ₦20,000 and don't even ask questions because that is your person.

₦20,000 a month for those random transfers and small financial assists.?₦20,000 × 12 = ₦240,000.

This does not include serious emergencies or large financial support. This is simply the small-small money that moves between two people because they are in a relationship.

Yearly random transfers total: ₦240,000

You cannot date in 2026 and pretend telecommunications are free. You have to call. You have to text. You have to send memes. You have to send TikToks. You have to video call. You have to say good morning and ask if they have eaten. You have to call back because somebody said your response sounded somehow. You also have to watch all the reels they send you.

₦20,000 a month for data and calls. ₦20,000 × 12 = ₦240,000. If you are in a long distance relationship or constantly on video calls, please do not use our number. Your own figure will be significantly higher.

5. Hair, Nails, Grooming And "I Have A Date" Expenses

Now we are getting into the expenses that people pretend have nothing to do with dating. Hair. Nails. Lashes. Brows. Barbing. Perfume. Skincare. Maybe a new outfit. Because sometimes you already have clothes, but suddenly none of them are giving "I am going on a date with my person."

₦50,000 a month. ₦50,000 × 12 = ₦600,000. And before the men start laughing, your barber, skincare routine, gym membership, new shirt, and perfume are also looking at you. Nobody is innocent here.

This is probably the sneakiest one. You are not even intentionally shopping for your partner. You are at the supermarket and see their favourite snack. You buy it. You are walking past a shop and see a shirt that looks like them. You buy it. They casually mention they have been looking for a particular perfume. Suddenly you are asking for the price.

These are not birthday gifts. They are the random little things you buy because you thought of them.

₦20,000 a month. ₦20,000 × 12 = ₦240,000. Small-small until you calculate everything.

Your partner's birthday comes once a year but your bank account will remember it for much longer. Gift — ₦50,000
 Cake — ₦20,000
 Dinner or outing — ₦50,000

We are not even doing anything extravagant. No hotel. No international trip. No new car. Just a gift, a cake, and a nice outing.

You go out, buy a gift, get flowers, or you decide to recreate your first date because you are both feeling sentimental. If you do not celebrate anniversaries, congratulations. You have saved ₦50,000. Please invest it wisely.

February has entered the chat. Even people who say Valentine's Day is just a normal day somehow end up doing something. A nice dinner. Flowers. Chocolate. A small gift. Maybe transport. That is another ₦50,000 gone in the name of love.

Then December arrives with its usual financial violence. Christmas gift for your partner. Maybe a Christmas date. Maybe you are travelling to see them. Maybe you are buying something for their family because the relationship has progressed to that stage. Maybe they say "don't buy me anything" but you know better.

Honestly, December could easily cost much more. December always costs much more.

Remember, this is not an extravagant celebrity relationship. Nobody bought a car. Nobody travelled out of the country. Nobody booked a private island. Nobody got an engagement ring. This is just two people dating, seeing each other, going on dates, exchanging gifts, helping each other out and doing the occasional nice thing, and somehow, we have reached ₦2.6 million.

This is an estimate, not a universal dating price list. Your relationship could cost significantly less. It could also cost way more. Maybe you don't do expensive dates. Maybe you live close to each other. Maybe you don't send each other money. Maybe your partner's idea of a romantic evening is buying suya and watching Netflix at home.

On the other hand, maybe you see each other every weekend, take flights to visit, love fancy restaurants and buy expensive gifts. Your number will look very different. The point is simply to show how small expenses become big expenses when you add them up over 12 months.

You Don't Need All Of This To Have A Relationship

Before somebody starts thinking "so if I don't have ₦2.6 million I shouldn't date", not exactly.&nbsp;

Relationships can absolutely exist without expensive dates, random gifts, constant transfers, or fancy Valentine's plans. You can cook together. Take walks. Watch movies at home. Split bills. Take public transport. Buy each other snacks. Sit somewhere and gist for three hours.&nbsp;Sometimes the most memorable dates cost almost nothing.

Let's also be honest, getting dressed up and going somewhere nice is fun. Surprising your partner with a gift is fun. Going out for dinner is fun. There is nothing wrong with spending money on someone you love. The problem is when you are spending money you don't have because you think being a good partner means constantly proving your love with your debit card.

Ask yourself the important questions.&nbsp;Not just "do I like this person?" Not just "are they fine?" Not just "does my heart do embarrassing things when they text me back within five minutes?"&nbsp;Also ask: "Can I realistically afford the kind of relationship we both want?"

Compatibility is not only about shared values and whether they laugh at your jokes and whether your families will get along. Sometimes it is also about whether you can both afford to show up for each other in the ways you both expect. If one person thinks dating means a new restaurant every weekend and the other person is on a strict "let's just stay in" budget, somebody is going to be frustrated, and frustrated in a relationship is a very expensive place to be emotionally.

Talk about money. Talk about expectations. Talk about who pays for what and how often and whether splitting the bill means the same thing to both of you. These conversations are not unromantic. They are how you avoid sitting across from each other at a restaurant six months later, both looking at the menu but really doing silent maths and trying to remember if you transferred rent yet.

Love might be free. The logistics of loving somebody in this Nigeria are very much not free. Love does not pay for Uber. Love does not recharge data. Love has never once successfully split a dinner bill. Money does all of those things and money needs to be discussed.

If you are currently single and reading this while eating alone in peace, congratulations. You have ₦2.6 million sitting quietly in your account not going anywhere. Guard it. Protect it. Cherish it. Because the moment you start telling people "I think I'm ready to date again" that money has already spiritually left your account. It just hasn't processed yet.

Since We Are Here, Here Is A Date Idea That Won't Send You To Your Bank App Crying

Now that we have thoroughly stressed you out with these numbers, here is something actually useful.&nbsp;<a href="https://aftrhrs.ng/events/popcorn-premieres-movie-movie-maayhem">Popcorn &amp; Premieres</a> is ₦12,000 for three movies, popcorn, and a drink. Three full movies for ₦12,000. We will wait while you process that. This is a real date you can go on with your real partner without checking your account balance on the way home with one eye closed and one eye praying.

You still get to dress up. You still get to sit next to your person in the dark pretending the movie is interesting when really you are just happy they are there. You still get to share popcorn and argue about which film to watch next and feel like a couple doing couple things.

You just get to do all of that without adding another ₦50,000 to the annual total we just showed you. Just click <a href="https://aftrhrs.ng/events/popcorn-premieres-movie-movie-maayhem">here</a> to get your tickets or visit <a href="https://aftrhrs.ng/events/popcorn-premieres-movie-movie-maayhem">www.aftrhrs.ng</a>

Your bank account has been trying to tell you something for months. Popcorn &amp; Premieres is simply that message in movie form.

How much does it really cost to have a boyfriend or girlfriend in Nigeria? We did the maths, from Valentine’s Day to random transfers and everything in between. 

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