Friendship is supposed to be about laughing together, sharing memories, and hyping each other up—That’s why we love BFF duos like FK and Jola. But if your girl keeps showing even a hint of the shady behaviors we’re discussing, it’s time to pay attention before your so-called “bestie” becomes your main stress.

Let’s be honest: some friends are just… messy, and there are still amazing friends out there who would kill for you.&nbsp; But if you start to feel some type of way around your bestie, sis, it’s probably not just in your head. Here are the friendship red flags you need to watch out for:&nbsp;

#1: The Friend Who Always Has Something to Say (Mostly Bad)

You know the type, you get a new hairstyle, wear a new outfit, or get a major life move and it's suddenly up for review. Your bag? “Fake.” Your boyfriend? “Ugly af.” Your parents? “Not trying.” Remember the <a href="https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSyWgw8d7/">Beauty-Goddess and Buba girl saga</a>? Viral TikToks have caught friends bad-mouthing their besties to other friends or even their boyfriends, classic “I have an opinion about everything you do” energy.&nbsp;

#2: The Friend Who Only Shows Up When She’s Heartbroken

This is the friend who vanishes like you never existed… until her relationship crashes. Suddenly, she’s texting, calling, venting, or posting voice notes like, “Omo, I really need you now.” Outside of heartbreak season? Ghost city. She’s sad, you’re sad… everyone cries together online, but don’t be fooled, this friendship is convenience, not loyalty. Tiffanyspeaks said on her TikTok video, “Friends like this don’t just drain your energy, they dim your vision.”

Classic Lagos energy. You finally buy that bag, post a fire selfie, get promoted, and she’s suddenly side-eyeing like she invented your success. Social media is full of “friend vs. friend” shade moments: besties subtly competing for likes, comments, or attention. If every little win you celebrate comes with jealousy, it’s not cute,&nbsp; it’s competition disguised as friendship. Real friends clap, hype, and celebrate your glow. Period.

Ever apologize for something small, only for her to come back with a list of your ancient crimes? Meanwhile, her shady moves get forgotten. Lagos girls call it “selective memory,” and trust me, it’s exhausting. The classic line: “That’s just how I am.” Translation: “I won’t take accountability for anything, but you better remember every time you slip up.” A friend like this will drain your energy while making you feel guilty for the normal human mistakes you make.

#5: The “It’s Just Banter” Gaslighter

This friend turns every hurtful comment, shade, or prank into “just banter”, until you finally snap, then she’s like, “Chill, I get angry easily, small thing dey vex me.”<a href="https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSyWpsJS9/"> This skit portrays this clearly</a>. Gaslighting disguised as jokes or personality quirks is a major red flag. Don’t ignore it; friendships are meant to uplift, not leave you questioning your sanity.

Now, don’t get it twisted, not all friends are a headache. There are still the real ones out there, the FK &amp; Jola, Priscilia &amp; Eni, the ride-or-die types who hype you up, laugh at your nonsense, and show up when it really matters. Friendship should be about laughs, memories, and good energy, not side-eye, shade, or gaslighting.

So yes, watch out for the red flags we’ve highlighted, but also celebrate the ones who actually make your life brighter. Because at the end of the day, sis, a good friend is priceless, and you know when you’ve found her.

Wondering if your bestie is toxic or you're just overthinking? These friendship red flags would help you decide. 

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