You know that kind of relationship that is somewhere in between a friendship and a romantic relationship. And it is characterized by a lack of commitment and clarity about the relationship's status. People in such relationships may do things that couples do, such as going on dates, spending time together, and being physically intimate. However, some may not define themselves, or be exclusive with each other.&nbsp;

Some people, use it to test the waters of a romantic relationship without making a full commitment. It is also a&nbsp; way for people to avoid the emotional vulnerability that comes with being in a committed relationship. Have you ever been or are currently in a situationship? You know, that ambiguous relationship where you're not quite sure where you stand with the other person? In fact, a recent study found that nearly half of all millennials have been in one. And while they can be fun and exciting at first, they can also be confusing and frustrating.

&nbsp;If you're in such a situation and you're not sure what to do, you're in luck. In this article, I will discuss the good, the bad, and the coping mechanisms of situationships. I'll also offer some advice on how to move on, and some real-life experiences.&nbsp;&nbsp;

There are definitely some good things about situationships. For one, they can be a lot of fun. You get to spend time with someone you're attracted to, without having to commit to anything serious. This can be a great way to explore your feelings for someone and see if there's potential for a real relationship. It can also be a source of validation. If you're someone who struggles with low self-esteem, being in one can make you feel good about yourself. It can show you that someone is interested in you and that you're desirable.

Of course, there are also some downsides to situationships. One of the biggest problems is that they can be confusing and frustrating. You might not know where you stand with the other person, and you might be constantly wondering if they're seeing other people. This can lead to a lot of anxiety and stress. Another problem with it is that it can be emotionally draining. If you're constantly investing your time and energy into someone who doesn't seem to be fully committed to you, it can take a toll on your emotional well-being.

I hung out with this guy for a year,&nbsp; this was a friendship that went from a relationship into a situationship. But we never had the DTR talk(define the relationship talk). It was a fun and loving relationship, we did everything couples do and even more. He sweeps me off my feet and touches me in the right spot, sometimes I look at him and say "What a man"! Because he was lovely and cared for me in every way possible. In all these, the only thing away from being married is commitment. Hmmmm.&nbsp;

I was scared to ask the questions because he was someone I have grown to like and love. Besides, I wasn't ready for the DTR talk.&nbsp;We move,&nbsp; Lol.&nbsp;Let me enjoy it while it lasts. No pressure, no stress. I thought to myself.&nbsp; Months passed and I finally had the urge to know where we were headed. I hate assumptions and second-guessing. So I worked up the courage to ask and deal with anything that comes out of it.&nbsp;&nbsp;

One evening we went on a date and I threw in the question,&nbsp; “What are we”? “Can we give this relationship or whatsoever a definition”? He seemed shocked and spellbound as he didn't see the question coming, It threw him off balance. When he finally got his words together, he said he was not emotionally, financially, or psychologically ready for any commitment. Hmm,&nbsp; is it not always the case with them?&nbsp;

Still, I wasn't ready to leave, it gradually became friends with benefits kinda situationship, and we went with the flow, till everyone was ready to move on.&nbsp;But in all of this,&nbsp; was I heartbroken? Yes, in fact,&nbsp; It took me a whole month to recover from the realization that there was no future with this guy.&nbsp; Whether he was right or wrong was immaterial to me, because I had the power to safeguard myself from this heartbreak, but I was held back by mixed feelings.

&nbsp;I won't blame him, because I&nbsp; saw the signs(no future plans or discussion, didn’t know his social circle, not consistent with his actions, last-minute plans, no productive conversations, all about the sex) clearly and earlier enough and&nbsp; I didn't ask the right questions because I was scared to face reality and was carried away too. I am to blame. After all, he didn't ask me out. What was I expecting, for a miracle to happen? How? When he has free food with no responsibility and accountability. just dey play lol.&nbsp;

In the end, I learned a valuable lesson. I learned that I need to be more assertive and ask the right questions with needed answers, even if I'm afraid of the outcome. I also learned that I deserve to be in a relationship with someone who is willing to commit to me.

I had this relationship going on fine and lovely. Met this lady online, on Facebook to be precise. We got talking, asked her out, and boom it became a relationship. It was easy because we both were in the same city.&nbsp; The relationship gave everything it was supposed to give and more but unknowing to me this lady used me dey catch cruise.&nbsp; Hmmm

A year into the relationship, I noticed some signs that made me question her commitment to me.&nbsp; For me, 1year into a relationship was a lot of time to throw away just like that.&nbsp;I had to find a way to get the record straight and have a conversation to ascertain what was going on.&nbsp;During the conversation,&nbsp; she didn't really make sense to me. Just beating around the bush. When I pressed further she opened up on how she didn't want to be tied down and just wanted to live her life on her own terms. She also said that she might be open to co-parenting in the future, but that she didn't want to be in a serious relationship right now. “I no want stress”, in her words.&nbsp;

I was in shock, coming to the realization that, I had been played all along, 1 year of my time in the drain. I tried to convince her to give us a chance, but she vehemently refused. I was heartbroken, but why? Why were you leading me on when you knew clearly there was never gonna be a future between us? Why allow me to invest so much into this to take it away from me, I kept asking the why questions and never got an answer.&nbsp;

I moved on and I'm glad that I did. I learned a valuable lesson from this experience and I'm now more careful about who I get involved with. I'm also more aware of the signs(refused to let me close to his family,&nbsp; no future conversations, inconsistent, less time together, no exclusivity, edgy and sneaky) that someone might not be ready for a committed relationship.

I'm still not over what happened, but I'm getting better. I know that I deserve to be with someone who wants the same things as me and I'm confident that I'll find that person eventually. See me planning forever not knowing I was dating myself all along. Lol.

&nbsp;Coping Mechanisms Dealing with Situationship

If you're in a situationship and you're not sure what to do, there are a few coping mechanisms that can help. First, it's important to talk to the other person about what you're looking for. Let them know that you're not interested in a casual relationship, and see if they're on the same page. If the other person is not interested in a serious relationship, it's time to move on. This can be tough, but it's important to remember that you deserve to be with someone who wants the same things as you.

Set clear boundaries:&nbsp;Clearly define your expectations and communicate them with the other person to establish boundaries that protect your emotions and avoid potential misunderstandings.&nbsp;&nbsp;

Focus on self-care:&nbsp;Prioritize self-care activities that nurture your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy, practice self-reflection, and take time for relaxation and self-care routines.&nbsp;&nbsp;

Seek support from friends and loved ones:&nbsp;Reach out to trusted friends or family members who can provide a listening ear, guidance, and emotional support during challenging times. Sharing your experiences and feelings can help alleviate some of the emotional burdens&nbsp;

Practice self-reflection:&nbsp;Reflect on your own needs, desires, and goals outside of the situationship. Assess whether the current arrangement aligns with your long-term happiness and personal growth. Take time to understand your own emotions and evaluate what you truly want in a relationship.&nbsp;&nbsp;

Engage in personal growth activities:&nbsp;Utilize this period to focus on personal development. Engage in activities such as pursuing hobbies, learning new skills, or working on personal goals. This can help you maintain a sense of purpose and growth, independent of the relationship.&nbsp;&nbsp;

Explore other connections: Keep an open mind to meeting new people and building connections beyond the relationship. Engaging in new social interactions can broaden your perspective and potentially lead to healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

Practice acceptance and detachment:&nbsp;Acknowledge that you may not have control over the other person's actions or feelings. Practice acceptance of the situation and detach emotionally to protect your own well-being. This can involve letting go of expectations and focusing on what you can control – your own actions and choices.&nbsp;&nbsp;

Remember, coping mechanisms may vary from person to person, so it's important to find what works best for you. If the situation becomes emotionally challenging or takes a toll on your mental health, it may be beneficial to seek professional support from a therapist or counselor who can provide personalized guidance and assistance.

Stuationships are different for everyone. Some people might not like them because they can be uncertain, but others find them valuable and a chance to grow and explore. Regardless of your perspective, remember that with time and support, you'll be able to move on from your situationship and find a healthy, fulfilling relationship.

Have you ever found yourself in an undefined  relationship, where your partner avoids commitment or seems to be playing games? It can be tough when you genuinely like someone, but they don't want the same level of involvement. This can can be heartbreaking. So, how do you cope and move forward? Don't let mixed signals hold you back, Join me as I  delve into the world of situationships, discussing the good, the Bad and effective coping mechanisms. 

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