&nbsp;When it comes to finding a partner, everyone has an illusion of the type of person they are hoping to find: their type, kind, spec or whatever you might choose to call it. For most guys my age – to paint the picture perfectly, I’m 29, and we can all agree that younger women are hot in the market. Guys around my age are searching for someone young and fresh, with a beautiful face and a hot figure. In general, most guys are in search of a baddie. But for me, it was quite different; at first, I never considered age to be a primary factor in my relationships; the most important thing to me was that you were of legal age and attractive. Along the line, I noticed a pattern: although I got a lot of attention from women my age range, the attention I craved the most was that of women older than I was and that gave relationships a whole different thrill. For fact's sake, I tend to avoid women who are married or in committed relationships simply because my morals won’t allow me to pursue such a desire. So, no matter how attractive you are to me, I take a step back the instant I find out you’re married.

One of my first memories concerning older women was back in secondary school. Most of the girls who wanted to be friends with me or just wanted to be around me were girls in higher classes. I remember my first experience in JSS1, and this SS2 girl approached me. I innocently never read any meaning to her gestures or body language, but growing up, I realized that she might have been fascinated by me. She had not been aware of my class at the beginning of our first conversation, but the aura between us had been so relaxing and accepting. She eventually asked for my class, and telling her changed the dynamics of our supposed relationship; we settled on having a school mother-and-son relationship until she eventually graduated.

As the last born in my family, regardless of how old I was – at this point, I had entered university, I was practically the servant to all my older siblings, especially when they had guests over. I began drawing the attention of most of their friends’ particularly female friends of my sisters. They would gush all over and converse with me like I was a guy their age, buying me food and gifts, but they never pursued further. I guess my sisters would have been against it because I was clearly of legal age to do whatever I wanted. I also got a lot of attention from female lecturers back in university, and thinking about everything now, I don’t think I would have ever thought about being with older women if I wasn’t always, in one way or another, getting a series of attention from them. My fascination with being with women older began from past attention and attraction I had received.

To this day, one of my best relationships has been with an older lady named Tosin. This woman was the embodiment of beauty; she was perfect in all ramifications, from her eyes to her luscious lips to her well-moulded breasts and professionally carved-out hourglass figure – God definitely created Tosin on a Sunday because that woman was a goddess. I met Tosin during my NYSC, I was 26 at that time, and she was in her late 30s. I was posted to the company where she worked in Enugu, but at first, I hadn’t even fully noticed her. She was always on her own; she did her work without bothering anybody, unlike the others who were practically out for interns and corpers. On this particular day, we were both working a bit late and knowing civil servants, they hardly stayed beyond their clock-out time, so we were practically alone in the office. I remember stealing glances at her every chance I got, and my oh my, it was that day I realized what a beauty she was. I can’t clearly remember what kickstarted our conversation, but I know that night was the first time I had heard her laugh, and it was music to my ears. I was completely smitten by this woman, and there had been no going back, but I resisted the urge to push it.

&nbsp;After that night, we got much closer but avoided showing it at the office. We would text and call regularly, speaking for hours. I got to know that she had never been married, although she had a daughter from one of her previous relationships, but that didn’t make whatever feelings I had of her falter. It took about a month of talking before she invited me to her place, and for a man who had been around, I was nervous about seeing this woman. Getting to her place, I realized that she was a lot shyer than I had expected her to be. She usually seemed bold and confident during our conversations and when she was at the office, but on that day, I met a whole new and different Tosin. The idea of this woman being shy around me made me a lot more excited and confident that she actually liked me. Our first date at her place was amazing. Apart from being shy, the aura surrounding her and her home was comforting. Before you ask, nothing sexual happened that day, not even a kiss. We spoke for hours, cooked together and cuddled. I can’t lie; I wanted her that day, but I hoped to play my cards right. I needed her to be completely comfortable and relaxed around me.

The second time I got invited to her place, we were a lot relaxed being around each other, and I remember that day we had our first kiss. I had eagerly waited for her to make the first move, and I gave in fully when she did. Our first kiss was nothing compared to the first time we had sex, and let me tell you, till today, no other woman has come close to giving me the ecstasy I felt that day. Sex with Tosin was amazing, her body being so soft, so perfect. We took our time exploring each other’s bodies; we let our bodies dance to every rhythm our hearts wanted; the heat between us was so engulfing that the orgasm that came with it was utterly transcending.

My relationship with Tosin was beautiful, slow, mature, and nurturing. She was the definition of peace of mind. I never felt the pressure I usually did when dating younger girls; she allowed me to grow in every phase of my life, supporting me and being my biggest fan. She never doubted me; she trusted me with everything in her, and she was extremely gentle and understanding. Being with a woman like that automatically made me want to do better in every aspect of my life, and I didn’t mind the idea of coming home to her forever.

However, our relationship had to end because she left the country, and she was of the ideology that if we kept our relationship, she might hold me back from exploring my full potential. Trust me, I wouldn’t have thought twice if she decided otherwise. But in conclusion, apart from Tosin, every other older woman I have come in contact with had the same comforting and gentle energy she had, and I don’t think that would ever change.

The energy you get from dating a young girl is completely different from that of dating an older woman - the aura surrounding a relationship with an older lady is more comforting and mature which is not something I'm willing to give up.

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